The Poet

I recently learned that hurt makes you a poet,
You start speaking your emotions through poetry,
Express yourself in words people hardly understand.
I say hardly because the most beautiful poems I've ever read, are so cryptic .
I read them when I was younger, they were just well written.

I re-read them again, and now they have a different meaning to me.

They touch my soul, and I feel like I live through them.
They are not my words, yet I feel so connected.
Sometimes I wish those poets weren't dead.
Sometimes I feel I'm dead. 

Devoid of emotions,
till I hear a love song,
read a love poem ,
read a poem about grief, see someone suffer.

Why do we need such extreme things to happen,
to make us feel? 

I feel so much.
And then some days I feel nothing.

It's a tough place to be in.
I'm a tough person to be around.
I wish everything was not extreme. 

I wish.. everything was back to last year this time.
When the most beautiful thing in my life happened.

Though I don't get to rewind, only move forward.
Forward with... Forward to...?
I don't know it's all hazed up now.
I'm tired now, I just want all of this to fade away... I want to fade away